Lesson 6: All By Myself!
Being lonely is a hard thing to deal with. You can be in the middle of a crowd and feel lonely. Your mind starts telling you that nobody cares about you at all. It may not be true, but you sure feel like that’s the way it is. When we are lonely, we forget that Jesus has promised to always be there for us no matter what. When loneliness sets in, we end up cutting ourselves off from others instead of reaching out to others. In this lesson, the children will learn about how to deal with loneliness. When you feel like there is no one else who cares for you, just remember that Jesus is always there.
Leader: Kids, today we are talking about how to DEAL WITH being... (Silly Willy pops up singing the song, “Mr. Lonely” by Bobby Vinton)
Leader: Silly Willy! What are you doing?
Silly Willy: (continues to sing)
Leader: Silly Willy, hold on! Cut the music! (music stops) What are you singing about?
Silly Willy: I’m singing about the fact that I am soooo lonely!
Leader: You are? Why do you feel lonely?
Silly Willy: Because nobody likes me at all. NOBODY!
Leader: Silly Willy, now that’s not true.
Silly Willy: It sure is. The other day, I wanted to play video games, but my friends wanted to go to the mall. So, I told them that if they wanted to go to the mall, then they could just go without me. So they did.
Leader: Well, that doesn’t mean they don’t want to be your friend.
Silly Willy: Sure it does. But, that’s not all. There was Ginger, this girl at school I really like. I asked her to go to the School Dance with me.
Leader: Really? What did she say?
Silly Willy: She said she would rather not. Can you believe that? She must think I smell like a camel’s armpit or something. NOBODY likes me at all! I am all by myself! LONELY!!!!
Leader: Well, Silly Willy, I know it is easy to feel lonely when you think no one wants to be your friend. But, it doesn’t sound like that is what has happened. It sounds like you have had a couple of misunderstandings with a few people. Even though it may seem like you are all alone, you really aren’t.
Silly Willy: I don’t get it. What do you mean?
Leader: Well, the Bible says that we are NEVER alone. It tells us that God is always with us. It says that no matter what happens in our life, God will never leave us alone. So, even though you feel like you are all alone, you really aren’t.
Silly Willy: But, I still FEEL alone.
Leader: I know. Sometimes our feelings can play tricks on us. We FEEL like we are alone, but it’s never as bad as we really FEEL. Besides, even when it seems like we have no one, God is always there. He will take care of us and never leave us.
Silly Willy: That’s awesome! You know, I probably shouldn’t have told my friends to leave anyway. I could have handled that better. And, Ginger probably doesn’t think I stink. Maybe she just wants to be friends.
Leader: Now, you’re talking. Just remember that you are never truly alone. No matter how lonely you may feel, God is always there.
Silly Willy: Thank you so much! I am going to go try to make things right with my friends. See you later!
Leader: See you later! You know, kids, today we are going to learn how to deal with the same thing Silly Willy was dealing with...loneliness. It’s not easy, but God can help us to DEAL WITH IT!
Choose one boy and one girl to compete in this game. Decide which one will “go first.” Send both players out of the room. Mix up all the pieces of cardstock and adhere them to a wall or “game board.”
When you say, “Go,” (start the game music/timer) the first player runs into the room, up to the wall or game board and begins rearranging the pieces of cardstock until they have put them in the correct order of the Power Verse. When they finish, stop the timer.
Then, mix up the pieces of cardstock again and have the next player do the same thing. Whichever player puts the Power Verse in the right order in the fastest amount of time wins.
Power Verse I will never leave you. I will never forsake you. - Hebrews 13:5
(Start the message by sharing a personal story from your life that describes a time when you felt lonely.) We all have to deal with loneliness at some time in our life. When we are feeling it is so easy to think that no one cares and no one even knows we exist.
The truth is, we are never really alone, no matter how lonely we feel. The Bible says that God is everywhere all the time. Our Power Verse today teaches us that God will “never leave us and will never forsake us.” So, when you find yourself feeling lonely, there are several things you must do.
God is always there with us, no matter how lonely we feel. We may not always “feel” Him there with us, but He is still there. (choose a volunteer from the audience; have them stand in front of you facing the audience; position yourself right behind them) It’s just like this person. I am here behind them. Do they see me? No, they can’t see me because they are looking straight ahead. Can they “feel” me? No, they can’t really “feel” me standing here. But, just because they can’t see me or feel me here with them, does that change the fact that I am right here? No, it sure doesn’t.
Kids, sometimes we can’t “feel” God’s presence with us because we are so focused on the feeling of loneliness that we have. But, just because we can’t see or “feel” God with us doesn’t change the fact that He IS there with us. We may feel alone, but we are never alone because God will “never leave us and will never forsake us.” (allow your volunteer to sit down)
So, when you are facing a time of loneliness, you have to DEAL WITH IT first by remembering that God is always there with you no matter how lonely you feel. There is something else we must do when we begin to deal with loneliness..
When we feel lonely, we convince ourselves that no one wants to have anything to do with us. We end up shutting ourselves off from the people around us. (as you speak, begin to build a wall with the bricks) We look at others and we say, “They don’t want to be my friend.” They never said that, but because we feel lonely we assume that’s what they think. We begin to build a wall between ourselves and those around us. When we build a wall, does that help people get close to us or does it push people further away? (allow response) That’s right, it pushes people away.
Instead of convincing ourselves that no one wants to be our friend and building walls between us and those around us, we should begin to reach out to others. We need to work on BEING a friend if we want to HAVE a friend. When we see someone who needs help, reach out to them and help them. That builds a bridge between you and them. Suddenly, they know they can count on you as a friend and you are no longer lonely...you have a friend. It’s all because you CHOSE to reach out, build a bridge, and BE a friend to someone. Stop building walls when you feel lonely. Start building bridges.
There’s one more thing that you can always do when you feel lonely...
You say, “Well, why do I want to worship when I am dealing with loneliness?” I will tell you why. When you feel all alone, just begin to worship God, sing songs to Him, and let His presence fill your heart. Suddenly, in the middle of worship, do you know what happens? God’s presence surrounds you and you begin to almost feel His arms surround you and hold you.
When we worship, God responds. He responds by allowing us to feel His powerful presence. He reminds us that we are not alone. He is right there with us. He will give us the strength we need to build bridges, build friendships, and DEAL WITH loneliness.
(begin worship music) Tell the children that we are going to DEAL WITH loneliness right now. We are going to worship God for the next several minutes and allow Him to let His presence fill our hearts. Towards the end, have the children who are struggling with feeling lonely come forward for prayer. Then, end by thanking God that He is always with us, no matter how lonely we feel.
What was today’s Big Idea? Answer: No Matter Where I Am, No Matter Where I Go, God Is With Me This I Know!
Where did Silly Willy’s friends want to go but he didn’t? Answer: The mall
What did Silly Willy say Ginger must have thought he smelled like? Answer: A camel’s armpit
Who is always with us, no matter how lonely we feel? Answer: God
Do we always “feel” God’s presence with us? Answer: No, not always
True or False: God is with us whether we feel Him or not. Answer: True
Instead of building walls when we feel lonely, we should build __________. Answer: Bridges
What is the name of the Survival Specialist on our videos? Answer: Flint McThornbody
Our Power Verse said, “I will never leave you, I will never ______________ you.” Answer: Forsake
Where was our Power Verse found? Answer: Hebrews 13:5
At Home Instructions
Big Idea No Matter Where I Am, No Matter Where I Go, God Is With Me. This I Know.
Power Verse I will never leave you. I will never forsake you. - Hebrews 13:5
PRESCHOOL & ELEMENTARY Take two of the dolls and tell your children that these dolls are best friends. Ask your children to describe some of the things best friends might do when they’re together.
Then put one doll aside and tell your children that one doll had to move away. Talk about the following questions:
• How do you think the doll that was left behind feels?
• What would you do if your best friend moved away?
• Have you ever felt lonely? If so, what did you do?
Now take all of the other dolls and put them near the doll that’s alone, leaving a space between them. Discuss the following:
• What can this doll do to make new friends?
• Do you think the other dolls will come to her, or will she need to go to them?
• What kind of attitude should this doll have if she wants to make new friends?
• Who would you rather be friends with, Eyeore or Winnie the Pooh? Why?
Explain to your children that it’s normal to occasionally feel lonely. Tell them that during these times, it’s important to keep a positive attitude. Suggest that they look for other people who might need a friend or talk to people they don’t normally talk to. And encourage them to talk to you!
Most importantly, remind them of Jesus’ promise in Matthew 28:20: “Surely I am with you always, even to the end of the age.” We are never really alone.
AGES 12 & UP Strange as it may seem, even in the midst of text messages, IM’s, email, and social media, it’s easy to feel lonely. Loneliness really doesn’t have anything to do with how many people you’re around; it has more to do with the relationships you have with the people you’re around. You’re a lot less likely to feel lonely, for example, when you’re hanging out with your one best friend than when you’re at a party with 50 people you don’t know very well.
Loneliness is a pretty common emotion during your teen years— almost everyone struggles then with acceptance and feeling like they fit in. Discuss some of the following things you can do when you’re facing this struggle:
• What are some places you can go or clubs you could join where you could meet people who would make good friends?
• What could you do with your spare time that would help you make friends? (Think of ways to reach out to other people as well as ways to develop and grow personally)
• What are some changes you could make in your attitude that would help you make friends?
• What are some things God may be trying to teach you during periods of loneliness?
Even though it may not always feel like it, we’re never really alone—God is always with us. Times of loneliness can help us cultivate a deeper relationship with God as we realize once again that we’re truly dependent on Him for everything.
Pray, and thank God for each of your friends and ask Him to open your eyes to others who may need a friend. If you’re lonely right now, ask Him to help you both feel His presence and find other Christians to develop friendships with.